Life is too short for boring stories

It was one of the rare afternoons, a laptop and a tea on the couch. I thought I was lost in what I was doing when I saw a crawl out of the corner of my eye. It was irritating, inasmuch as I would perceive in these moments under the conditions of a single plodding, I am so entangled in it, but at that moment I let myself be distracted by a mere scamper. I looked up thoughtfully when I realized the cause, because it is yet another time that you have to go through the living room and through my field of vision.

„Could you wear your clothes, please?“ I said stretched, because it would of course distract, if you ran naked through the apartment.
„Why?“ you answered, pausing right in front of me, „Am I distracting you?“
„Yes, you certainly do, you know that. I’ve asked you so many times to dress you and not walk around naked,“ I explained. „I know you should feel well, and for whatever reason, you’ll feel well, but I’d appreciate it if you did it changes.“
“Do you want me maybe on sensory thoughts?“ you asked, and now, with the best of intentions, I can no longer ignore your suggestive undertone.
„I think of how aptly the term ‘shriveled pump gender sign‘ is,“ I replied calmly.
„Did you always have words,“ you said with a frown, „but that does not sound nice.“
„First, it’s not my word, it’s Helene von Druskowitz’s,“ I patiently explained, adding that your obvious knowledge gap has occurred, „And second, it’s not supposed to be nice.“
„But you do not want to tell me that you do not like the outstanding tribute of my masculinity?“ you asked.
„But, just that, and you have to admit that this little, shriveled thing does not live up to even the most modest aesthetic demands,“ I said.
„But he always liked you?“, you made a new attempt.
„I never said I like it“, I replied frankly.
„And which one do you like then, if not mine?“, you asked, a little hurt, it seemed.
„No one,“ I had to admit, „if that calms you down. But please what should I like about it? So, it keeps pounding all the time and thinking it was great.“
„But are there moments when it gives you great pleasure?“, did you make another effort to save your male honor.
„That’s right. But these are also the occasions where most of the time is hidden.
„I do not even accuse you that your breasts have become worn-out“, you thought to have to interject.
That’s why I do not want to go around naked,” I explained calmly. At this point, you turned around without a word and came back a few moments later, wearing boxer shorts.
„And, do I now meet the aesthetic demands of the gracious woman?“, you asked provocatively, of course, I did not escape the fact that you pouted me.

And because that’s not the case, I wanted to take you by the hand, steered you into the bedroom and into the bed, whereupon I did that, I was forbidden to take you off a few minutes ago. Lovingly I looked at the small, wrinkled shriveled pump, because you can also look at unaesthetic things lovingly. Especially because it did not last long. Even if only a few minutes later, after I had dealt with it, it was neither small nor wrinkled and certainly no longer shriveled pump, but rather impressive. Actually, I could have told you that too, but how would I have been taught since my earliest childhood? „You do not speak with your mouth full“.

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