Mist-bedded, delicately flattered, the rugged, steep stone walls rise to the sky, mist-bedded, taking away the heaviness of the night. The mist flows around the stones, me, whispering, urging: „Go ahead, stay with me, go the way, I suppose you.“
The wind has gone to rest: „Do not you want to finally find peace?“, He whispers in my head.
Oh yes, I want to be calm, finally, quite, very quiet, and the rock walls invite me: „Then climb up to us, climb up to us, and let yourself fall, into a long, long sleep that neither dream knows the end, the long, long sleep, which does not disappoint you and does not release you in the worriedness and restlessness that knows nothing but continuity and acceptance. „There is no loyalty other than his.“
„I thank you for your invitation, but that is not the way I have chosen,“ I think, while my bare feet touch the fine gravel, sinking a little, leaving a small trail carefully and reliably with the next wave is leveled, inflexible and unimpressed.
„You breathe the freedom. You feel unencumbered. „, Whispers the moon, showering me with its silvery shine.
„Yes, I feel unencumbered, breathe freedom.“, I think, „For the first time, breathing and feeling, since the moment my lungs first filled independently, for the first time free and unencumbered.“
„We leave no mark, not in this world, not in this life.“, I think, „And as much as we would like it, not even in the thoughts and hearts of those who may have been attached to us. And that’s good. Thinking the traces as permanent paralyzed every thought. Nothing survives the long, long sleep, nothing goes with it, into the only freedom. If it were not so, the world would no longer be walkable because of traces, the thoughts would be petrified by sheer turning back, and the hearts would be sealed, unapproachable. No, nothing stays and nothing should stay. “
„Come to us, let us hug you.“, The waves whisper to me, tempting and sweet, rolling towards me, flattering my ankles, rearing, sinking and passing away to make room for their sisters to follow .
„Come to us to worship you all around, as soft as you have never been bedded.“
„I want to accept your invitation,“ I think, and turn to the waves.
And I step by step, water plays around my ankles, my thighs. „I want to come to you, let me fall into your embrace.“
The fog in front of me thickens, takes shape, forces me to stop, „Do not you know that’s not what you’re up to, did you really forget everything I taught you?“
„No, I know well what it is, and I have kept everything from what you have taught me, that has paralyzed my head and mind, has not allowed me to penetrate, to what my thoughts could have been. But now, now I’m letting my mind clear, through the water that accepts me as I am. “
And the next wave takes it, the misty figure, dissolving it.
And I step by step, water plays around my ankles, my thighs, my knees, when out of the silvery moonlight a figure breaks out, which prevents me from moving on: „What about your responsibility? What about all the tasks that are left undone. Wait, did you really forget everything I taught you? “
„No, I know my responsibility, and I’ve kept everything from what you’ve taught me, I’ve settled everything, the tasks assigned and entrusted to others who have not yet discovered that all the pursuit is nothing more than distraction – and deception maneuvers, because no matter how many tasks I fulfill, nothing saves me from this last path, none of us, why not do it then before I waste more power? “
A cloud pushing in front of the moon forces the moonlight figure to dissolve.
And I step by step, water playing around my ankles, my thighs, my knees, my loins, as the water rears up in front of me and a figure prevents my progress: „Why only you abandon me during all our years together? I just there for you, and so you thank me just by leaving me, do not you know how much I love you, do not you know that I cannot live without you? “
„No, I have not forgotten any of this, nothing of my initial euphoria, of all the illusions I succumbed to, and of all the hopes I had, but just as little did I forget about it as I did with this illusion of being together inwardly devoured until there was nothing left of me that reminded me of me, nothing of what I once was, I ran like sand through my fingers and the wind blew me away, I have not been for a long time. That’s not something you could love, there’s nothing left to love. “
And the water figure collapses before my eyes.
And while I extend my arms to embrace them one last time, I feel like I’m sinking, being embraced by the water, sinking without hindering it, wanting to hinder when I feel uplifted, lightly turned like a feather, and from a distance, the sound of a song, which is worth turning to, penetrates. I know, accepted, unencumbered and free.