On time, I arrived at the appointed meeting place on the implied Sunday, dressed with my most solemn dress. The ceremony was to take place near a small chapel in the middle of the city park. It was not permitted in the chapel. The church shouted hue and cry against this bad habit. But when does she not? And then I saw her, Rebekka, my best friend. She beamed with her pointed wedding dress in the balmy September sun. I had not seen her so happy for a long time. Maybe this whole thing was a good idea?
The ceremony went on as usual, with all the phrases that every child knows by heart, and every girl dreams of hearing them at least once in their lives. The people passed by, stopped. It was as if they were looking for something, something that belonged in their imagination but were not there. Just as I did. Rebekka did not seem to mind. She was just happy. So I decided to be as much as I could. Was it perhaps the white dress that every girl dreams of wearing at least once?
„So, it all started with writing for this program,“ she began to tell me when we were finally sitting in our favorite restaurant and I was temporarily condemned to silence because I had to eat.
„It took ten weeks and started with getting engaged with myself,“ she began to tell.
„Engaged?“ I had to interrupt now, despite a full plate, „Who knelt before whom?“
„Now do not be depreciative. Do you want to know it or not?”, she told me and my cynicism failed. „Next I met myself. It was a very exciting thing. You have to imagine that we are all as we are, always to be as the others want us, and never as we really are. But because we do not think about it, we do not learn it either. This is like a journey of discovery to a new continent. And at the end of this second week, I knew that I was really the most interesting human on earth, for me. Then I finally could sort out what’s going wrong in my life, because we always fight, and think it belongs so. Put it on the circumstances and what I know what else, it is simply because we hate ourselves and do not accept as we should. And then I left the self-hatch behind me and began to love me. Forever and ever. On this account, I negotiated an agreement with myself on which to base our relationship. This also meant taking care of me. All these things, which are seen as self-evident in every other respect, but never allow themselves to be accepted. So I invited myself to dinner, gave me gifts, and wrote me love letters. Yes, I even wrote poems. I was so self-assured, it’s unbelievable. And now it has to be carried into life. This is what I call a real, genuine, comprehensive feminism. Nowhere else can a woman express so clearly that she stands to herself. Integrity is called the well. A room for me alone, and no one to argue with me. “
A triumphant smile played around her lips as she looked at me. Apparently, she had finished her remarks, while I was less and less oriented.
„If I understand you correctly, you want to present the self-esteem of a single woman who wants to show the world that she can be very happy without a man,“ I tried to summarize my thoughts, „but why do you choose that form the exact opposite? Why do you marry when you do not want that? „